If you haven't seen the video of Paula Abdul screwing up more than ever on American Idol, check it out now. Then, read through the following pair of reality TV recaps...

Hell's Kitchen: This week's challenge is to make pizza. Gordon Ramsay wants to put a gourmet pizza on the menu (but not one topped with truffles, because they cost approximately $9000 each). He gives the teams 45 minutes to come up with a gourmet pizza... -- TV Squad

A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila: The final 18 arrive at the mansion in limos, pink and blue, natch. Chad is more excited to move into Tila than he is moving into the house, if you get his meaning. Michelle wants to bite Tila's sexy Asian ass. They see the big bed, and Brittany promises to castrate any male genitalia in her face... -- BuddyTV